A recent poll* found that as many as a third of “people” (I would assume this means Westerners) believe in ghosts and other spooky stuff, and nearly one-quarter have seen or otherwise “experienced” a ghost. I would have thought these percentages were a little high, except I slammed face-first into this mindset last Saturday.

A lady I used to work with invited Shadowboy to her Halloween party. Since all the parents were also invited, I offered to bring along my tarot cards and help with entertainment. She has one of those “treat the New-Agey stuff like an a la carte menu” things going on, so I knew she’d love the idea.** I did 15 or 20 readings, and I think that for ethical reasons I’m not going to do tarot readings any more. Because I knew I was making crap up, and I had people hanging on my every syllable. Three different people told me earnestly that I had given them incredibly accurate readings and that I had a real gift. (The gift of B.S., people.) And I don’t even give a very convincing performance; trying to act mystical just makes me giggle, and the deck I was using didn’t have the standard suits so I kept having to pause and remember whether bats were supposed to be swords or pentacles.

Now, let me pause to say that I’m not casting aspersions on anybody who uses tarot as part of their belief system.*** I wasn’t using them the “real” way, I was making stuff up as I went along. A while back I put together a “bluff your way through the tarot” guide, and that’s how I do readings. I took educated guesses, I made generalizations, and the only thing my Inner Eye was open to was a vague sense of alarm that I was being taken seriously.[4]

Anyway, I’m uncomfortable that I inadvertently affected peoples’ lives with a total pack of lies, but I’m a whole lot more uncomfortable that I was able to affect peoples’ lives with a total pack of lies.

I now see how professional psychics make money. Yeesh.

*This article links to another article entitled, What to do if your house has ghosts, which includes the sentence, “You can either learn to live with the novelty of a ghost in your house, or get in touch with a legitimate ghost researcher to help you understand what’s going on.” It’s the “legitimate” that gets me. Remember when CNN covered actual news?

**Back when I worked with her she told me with some pride that she was a “Reiki Master.” I looked up Reiki online, and the heading of one entry in the FAQ told me all that I needed to know about Reiki: “Origin of the $10,000 Fee” (Their reason: Since Reiki Mastership is so easily learned, the Japanese developer of the technique felt that Westerners might not value it. So charging a huge sum of money to “teach” it confers the respect it deserves. I just want to shake the hand of whomever came up with that particular angle.) I don’t think she paid that much for her “mastership,” but I expect she was soaked for a large sum. (Which maybe means she’s got substandard Reiki skills. Who knows?)

***Because one of them is my sister, and she could totally kick my ass.

[4] Incidentally, no matter what cards showed up, I predicted positive results all ’round. I’m not going to be the bearer of fake bad news.